Deserve Your Dream.
A former coach recently sent me a wonderful quote from famed writer Octavio Paz. It reads ‘Deserve your dream’. That simple, potent line reminding me that talking about my journey may help others push past their doubts or shed the weight of haters.
You Won How Many?
In late June I won 9 Regional Emmys for my work in 2020. Kind of crazy I must admit. Most of the winning stories focusing on the pandemic’s impact on public health and food insecurity. I decided to push for positive stories when the world closed in around us: people helping others and narratives encouraging viewers to give their time and money to those in need.
I watched the virtual Emmy awards show during an out-of-town, weekend reunion with old high school buddies. The very guys who never stopped believing in me. They, along with other inspiring forces like my wife, supportive family members, and talented co-workers, helped me amass 64 Regional Emmys in my 30 years as a TV news reporter.
But this story isn’t about recognition. It’s about how we can escape the voices that tear us down, find the strength inside to blossom while surrounding ourselves with people who know how to nurture and nourish.
They Said I’d Fail.
Teachers wanted to hold me back a grade. Twice. They said I was slow to learn.
Classmates called me stupid because I stuttered. I shouldn’t have believed them.
Mom worried I wasn’t university material, suggesting boot camp over college.
Dad insisted I quit bike racing in college. Said I wasn’t athletic enough and should get a job on top of my internship.
Abusive step-father kicked me out of the house in high school at 16. I had to fend for myself.
Professors said don’t go into TV news. You’re not disciplined or talented enough. You’ll fail.
One TV boss called me average. I’d never shine. Another said my writing made no sense.
Find your Fuel.
It was a struggle ignoring the doubters, cynics, and ill-wishers in my early years. Every rotten word slicing into me. Kind of like dying from a thousand small cuts. But at some point, something clicked. Maybe around 14 or 15 years old. Looking back, it felt like a survival instinct washing over me. Uncharitable words suddenly bounced off and turned to fuel. This octane-rich elixir all I needed to push on and find my way.
Truth be told, I wasn’t a quick learner. So, over time, you figure out how to work smarter. I decided it was ok to be a B student as long as I had an A+ attitude.
Bike racing didn’t come easy. So, I trained harder. Ironically, I won a state road racing championship at 20 right after my dad chastised me for riding too much during the summer. He didn’t come to that race. In fact, he never came to my races. A regret he still admits.
Learn from the Best. Ignore the Rest.
It wouldn’t be fair to downplay my parent’s strengths. They impressed upon me the importance of work ethic, honesty and public service for which I am forever grateful. They say they’re proud of me. Which, by the way, is code for ‘I love you’ when you struggle with that phrase.
To this day, they remain astonished at my accomplishments. They’ve always radiated the belief that you must work yourself to the bone or you’ll be penniless and on the streets. A hardscrabble philosophy handed down to them mercilessly by Depression/Holocaust era parents who struggled immensely with enjoying life.
I’m certain of one thing. My forebearers absolutely believed that a toiling approach to life was a gift, not a burden, handed down to future generations.
Never give up. Never surrender. (hat tip Galaxy Quest)
None of us would be who we are without facing, and navigating around, a mountain of obstacles placed in front of us either on purpose or by happenstance. There’s little to savor when the path to accomplishment has been cleared for us. Regardless of our best efforts, haters will ferret their way into our lives. It’s ok to hear them out. Remember, you don’t have to listen. Unless you need a little extra fuel to light your way.
Jay Korff is a storyteller for WJLA/7News On Your Side in Washington DC.
